Disappointed on myself

[NetProphet]

Actually, this is the scenario, I train table tennis daily as well as play matches with clubmates. Now, if I face players that I know I can't win, I am not pressured, I am relax, I think on how to beat them, and sometimes I do.

On the other hand, if I play with players with same level as me, I feel pressured and want to win so badly. Now, I get disappointed so much on my errors. I got angry to myself, I feel pressured, I can't think well, it seems like I am zoning out. Just serve, receive and rally, without thinking well because of pressure, angry and wanting to win so bad.

Sounds absurd, but I have read here that I need to have fun, and not wanting to win.

But, maybe because I feel like I trained more, and wasted more time, energy and $$, I feel pressured that I should have better results in games. Sometimes, I feel really bad and sometimes I want to quit table tennis.

So, how can I really be better? How can I stop wanting to win and just have fun?
How can I improve myself regarding this?

Honestly this reads to me again as another example of someone who has to learn to lose.
We spend so much time trying to improve and trying to win that it's easy to forget that sport is mostly about losing.
Every large competition, every Olympics, World Cup etc etc etc, 99% of the athletes compete and lose.
We give this no thought because our society continually shows and celebrates the winners.
But 99% lose. (OK, at a football World Cup with 32 teams its 97% lose but you get my drift).
So ya gotta accept losing without anger or irrational disappointment.
Ya gotta learn to lose gracefully, with dignity and respect for the opponent, not being too hard on yourself and taking the lessons you can from the defeat.
Then just view/channel the expectation you put on yourself, that's your drive and your competitiveness. You can still care and still want to win but when the match ends you'll have a way of dealing with it and looking at it that doesn't make you miserable.

That's a huge part of moving forward to win more and it allows you to have more fun no matter what the outcome.

 

[FH_Project]

I solve this frustration issue by two things. Still frustrate but I handle better than before. Video record, and back to basics.

Identify your mistakes CLEARLY that happened in the match. Make a checklist. Try to work on those. Be honest, opponent does things uncomfortable for you so that he can win.

Take it slow, work only one thing at a time. Seek for help from coaches or from YouTube videos that addresses similar mistakes and how to correct them. Maybe your bat angle changes alot while swinging arm. Having unstable elbow or shoulder, using muscles in wrong order, or you are not used to certain type of shot from a certain type of rubber, makes you too tensed and no room for forward acceleration etc.

I think this channel is gem for adults, who wants learn and understand technique in detail. Most ex-/pro players, explain stuff too simplified. Maybe they are over with basics decades ago. Just because pro player knows it doesn’t mean he can teach it. But the lady on this channel is good at explaining things.

Another of my favorites is Andreas Levenko. He explains things in a way that really connects with the audience. The way Andreas does it is very close to how I would approach teaching things.

Because you convert your perspective from emotional to deterministic, you are not gonna frustrate next time you don't win the point. You admit the cause and try to work on it or avoid such play that doesn't work without having emotional outburst.

 

[ML fan]

Honestly this reads to me again as another example of someone who has to learn to lose.
We spend so much time trying to improve and trying to win that it's easy to forget that sport is mostly about losing.
Every large competition, every Olympics, World Cup etc etc etc, 99% of the athletes compete and lose.
We give this no thought because our society continually shows and celebrates the winners.
But 99% lose. (OK, at a football World Cup with 32 teams its 97% lose but you get my drift).
So ya gotta accept losing without anger or irrational disappointment.
Ya gotta learn to lose gracefully, with dignity and respect for the opponent, not being too hard on yourself and taking the lessons you can from the defeat.
Then just view/channel the expectation you put on yourself, that's your drive and your competitiveness. You can still care and still want to win but when the match ends you'll have a way of dealing with it and looking at it that doesn't make you miserable.

That's a huge part of moving forward to win more and it allows you to have more fun no matter what the outcome.

Thank you! This helps a lot