How do you handle emotions during a game?

[Denso]

Last week, I had an extremely frustrating game against a lower-rated player (-200 TTR).

In the first set, he won 11:9 with two edge balls and two nets. In the second set, he got 5 (!) edge balls, the last one in the game point to 12:10. That's where I snapped and almost threw away my racket in frustration (bear in mind that I am normally a very calm player, so this almost never happens..).
In the third set, I somehow managed to turn my anger into a constuctive aggressive play to win 11:1. However, in the fourth set, he started of with an edge ball again, so that I fully lost my focus again to lose 11:6.
After the game, he told me that I was clearly the better player.

I know that there are days where the odds are simply against you and circumstances are out of your control.

Nevertheless, this game got me thinking real hard about my mental capacity to remain calm and focused throughout such a game. In fact, I have been struggling recently to bring my training form into competitive matchplay, particularly as my TT tends to break apart more and more when "unexpected" things happen.

I sometimes admire high-level players that manage to stay calm no matter what. However, I wonder how they get there.
On the other hand, I also wonder how someone like John McEnroe could even perform tennis at such a level.

Therefore, what are your strategies to deal with anger or emotions? Is it by channeling these emotions to a different "vent" by focusing on other aspects, or by suppressing the same? Any advice?

 

[Yuomay]

Yeah super frustrating to lose like that.

I’d probably try to vent.
If im playing well I can laugh it off.
If im playing poorly I complain out loud or grunt in frustration. It doesn’t help though

 

[Draycott old man]

Last week, I had an extremely frustrating game against a lower-rated player (-200 TTR).

In the first set, he won 11:9 with two edge balls and two nets. In the second set, he got 5 (!) edge balls, the last one in the game point to 12:10. That's where I snapped and almost threw away my racket in frustration (bear in mind that I am normally a very calm player, so this almost never happens..).
In the third set, I somehow managed to turn my anger into a constuctive aggressive play to win 11:1. However, in the fourth set, he started of with an edge ball again, so that I fully lost my focus again to lose 11:6.
After the game, he told me that I was clearly the better player.

I know that there are days where the odds are simply against you and circumstances are out of your control.

Nevertheless, this game got me thinking real hard about my mental capacity to remain calm and focused throughout such a game. In fact, I have been struggling recently to bring my training form into competitive matchplay, particularly as my TT tends to break apart more and more when "unexpected" things happen.

I sometimes admire high-level players that manage to stay calm no matter what. However, I wonder how they get there.
On the other hand, I also wonder how someone like John McEnroe could even perform tennis at such a level.

Therefore, what are your strategies to deal with anger or emotions? Is it by channeling these emotions to a different "vent" by focusing on other aspects, or by suppressing the same? Any advice?

We have had similar topics before,but I find this subject fascinating as I would love to be able to control my emotions and keep control when things go against you . I believe that if you want to be really good at Table Tennis, keeping mentally strong is almost as important as your Skill level . I hate myself for being so weak as I can't cope with nets and edges!!! Normal players say it's all part of the game, they are right and I'm not as I let it effect me !! But that's what makes this game so fascinating as you have to have great mendset if you want to succeed as well as Table Tennis Skills. Whatever happens try to remember you won't lose your house if you lose !! And praise yourself when you stay strong!!! Good luck!!! I've already lost as I'm 60 and am still weak minded !!!!

 

[Denso]

I believe that if you want to be really good at Table Tennis, keeping mentally strong is almost as important as your Skill level .

I fully agree.

Good luck!!! I've already lost as I'm 60 and am still weak minded !!!!

Thank you! I guess that one of the fascinating aspects of table tennis is that there are still lessons to be learned even at an "older" age. So don't give up and best of luck to you, too!

 

[Denso]

If im playing poorly I complain out loud or grunt in frustration. It doesn’t help though

I understand that. The problem is that if you're frustrated, your play deteriorates. I would like to learn to avoid being frustrated due to circumstances out of my control in the first place.

 

[Lazer]

it happens every now and then. Try to shake it off… You can train your mind to do
this…

I get pissed if I play bad but not if I play good and still loses.

Cheers
L-zr

 

[Tyce]

I've been congratulating people on edges and nets, I mean you don't hit those unless you take the risk so well played, good aim.
Saves me frustrations and sometimes it throws the opponent off even.

 

[NextLevel]

If you want a serious solution, practice and study mindfulness. The main thing is that you cannot control how the point evolves. You have to stand beside yourself as you play. When you listen to the top players with the best mental games, this is how they mostly approach points. We saw how Zhang Jike thought through his progress, we have seen how Hina Hayata after going down 0-2 in the finals of the Japanese Champs had to tell her self that it is okay to lose, and that everyone loses, and this freed her up to play her best game. Getting annoyed at losing is to some degree a form of entitled arrogance. Wang Manyu after losing to Batra was once asked about how to control or snap out of bad play and she made the point that if it was simple as telling yourself to play better, the problem would not exist. It is a very complicated issue and ultimately, there has to be an acceptance of your best effort and focus and the likelihood that it might not get the job done.

Last week, I had an extremely frustrating game against a lower-rated player (-200 TTR).

In the first set, he won 11:9 with two edge balls and two nets. In the second set, he got 5 (!) edge balls, the last one in the game point to 12:10. That's where I snapped and almost threw away my racket in frustration (bear in mind that I am normally a very calm player, so this almost never happens..).
In the third set, I somehow managed to turn my anger into a constuctive aggressive play to win 11:1. However, in the fourth set, he started of with an edge ball again, so that I fully lost my focus again to lose 11:6.
After the game, he told me that I was clearly the better player.

I know that there are days where the odds are simply against you and circumstances are out of your control.

Nevertheless, this game got me thinking real hard about my mental capacity to remain calm and focused throughout such a game. In fact, I have been struggling recently to bring my training form into competitive matchplay, particularly as my TT tends to break apart more and more when "unexpected" things happen.

I sometimes admire high-level players that manage to stay calm no matter what. However, I wonder how they get there.
On the other hand, I also wonder how someone like John McEnroe could even perform tennis at such a level.

Therefore, what are your strategies to deal with anger or emotions? Is it by channeling these emotions to a different "vent" by focusing on other aspects, or by suppressing the same? Any advice?

The other thing I honestly do not understand is why someone who is not a professional would be so consumed with his self image from losing and winning that he would get frustrated when chance incidents occur. If you cannot accept that you are not so much better than your opponent that losing points to them is impossible, you may need to play more table tennis. Professionals at least have the threat of losing money and livelihood, we mostly play for fun.

Look at when Lily Zhang played Anthony Edwards as another example. Lily Zhang is 2600, Anthony Edwards is a top athlete/basketball player who can make chance powerful shots but he wouldn't get more than two points on his very best day vs Lily and Lily tried to rally with him as if he was a beginner. But he made one good forehand and he got one point against her which is all he needed to win. It is always possible to lose to *any* player, especially when their TTR is over 1300-1400 if you do not play perfectly. And below that level, everyone has gaps in their game so the any gap below that level doesn't matter, they can lose to much lower rated players if the player brings something you do not like.

What the Lily-Edwards showed me was that Lily doesn't play many handicap games for money lol or more likely, she agreed to it just for the entertainment dimension and not because she really wanted to win, even amongst the biggest hustlers, they like to cap their opponents at 3 from the target in the best case because it is very easy to lose a game on 3 lucky shots/edges. So if playing to 21, they give 18 max, and if playing to 11, they give 8 max.

But back to the main point, since we don't get paid to do this, if mindfulness practice cannot help you, good luck.

 

[Denso]

The other thing I honestly do not understand is why someone who is not a professional would be so consumed with his self image from losing and winning that he would get frustrated when chance incidents occur.

It's not so much that "I'm consumed with my self-image". It's rather the fact that, even as an ambitious amateur player, it is simply frustrating to invest so much time on training and physical development and then fail to reap the rewards of success due to your reaction to chance incidents.

You have to stand beside yourself as you play.

Obviously, I have a lot to learn on the mental side of things and this is the "zen state" I would like to achieve, but I wonder if anyone has tips on how to actually train this?

 

[NextLevel]

It's not so much that "I'm consumed with my self-image". It's rather the fact that, even as an ambitious amateur player, it is simply frustrating to invest so much time on training and physical development and then fail to reap the rewards of success due to your reaction to chance incidents.



Obviously, I have a lot to learn on the mental side of things and this is the "zen state" I would like to achieve, but I wonder if anyone has tips on how to actually train this?

There are many books, videos etc. on mindfulness. It requires the ability to realize that most of your thoughts and reactions are automatic and that you can stand apart from them in reflection, so most of the training is usually some form of meditation so you can understand and manage how your focus and awareness work better.

The main thing to realize is that while it might make your results better, it is not the primary function. The primary function is to make you realize that you are not your emotions. You could even get an app to learn this, it is all over the internet. Many good coaches and sports psychologists will also get you into it. The book, Get Your Game Face On from Dora Kurimay, while it feels overpriced and was more like a manuscript, also got some of the basics down in terms of point preparation routines etc.

https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/meditation/in-depth/mindfulness-exercises/art-20046356

Amazon.com: Get Your Game Face On Like The Pros!: Mental Skills And Lifestyle Choices To Achieve Peak Performance And Play Your Best Table Tennis: 9781499714241: Kurimay, Dora, Toon, Kathy: Books

Amazon.com: Get Your Game Face On Like The Pros!: Mental Skills And Lifestyle Choices To Achieve Peak Performance And Play Your Best Table Tennis: 9781499714241: Kurimay, Dora, Toon, Kathy: Books

www.amazon.com

What did you lose as a result of losing the match? And while it can feel as if the world is against you when you lose a certain way, I suspect that the match was not as bad as you make out, and that your mindset impacted it much more than the actual points. Do you have a recording so you can review it and see how your experience of the match corresponded to how it actually played out?

 

[Denso]

Thank you. I appreciate your tips @NextLevel . Unfortunately, there's no recording of the match

On the topic of mindfulness in table tennis, I also stumbled upon the following recent article:

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/41721510/

Interesting read...

 

[just_one_more_chop]

Therefore, what are your strategies to deal with anger or emotions? Is it by channeling these emotions to a different "vent" by focusing on other aspects, or by suppressing the same? Any advice?

For me personally, "dealing with emotions" or "channeling them" would probably remove them from the moment but it would also take away focus in doing so, which in the end does not make my play better.
My skill level is probably average or below, but my enjoyment level while playing is above. Maybe thats why I never really struggled being on the receiving end of unfortunate ball exchanges.
If I had to name it I think acceptance is what lets me stay calm. Opponent hits a lucky edge, I smile and acknowldege it, game continues. I noticed two advantages in doing so: First, the planned one, I stay in a better mood and I am more likely to win the next point as if I would mourn over the lost point. Second, for me sort of surprising, many players expect their opponent to be mad after a lucky one. So when I smile about it or when they say sorry I reply no problem, it feels like their mentality takes a hit instead of mine cause their expectations of my reaction does not fit reality.

 

[Draycott old man]

I've been congratulating people on edges and nets, I mean you don't hit those unless you take the risk so well played, good aim.
Saves me frustrations and sometimes it throws the opponent off even.

Wow Tyce that's brilliant way to deal with it!!! Love that Attitude!!! I need a brain transplant lol 🤣 🤣 🤣

 

[Draycott old man]

I fully agree.

Thank you! I guess that one of the fascinating aspects of table tennis is that there are still lessons to be learned even at an "older" age. So don't give up and best of luck to you, too!

Thanks Denso !!! Maybe electric shock treatment might help lol 🤣 🤣 🤣

 

[Tyce]

Wow Tyce that's brilliant way to deal with it!!! Love that Attitude!!! I need a brain transplant lol 🤣 🤣 🤣

I used to get incredibly frustrated when I was younger. When I started playing again it was the one thing I vowed to do from day one - and it works

 

[Draycott old man]

I used to get incredibly frustrated when I was younger. When I started playing again it was the one thing I vowed to do from day one - and it works

I'm seriously going to give it a try 😉 nothing to lose !!!