The challenge is that a lot of the fun we attribute is to winning the whole game ... that causes the whole experience painful if you lose ... but if you can focus on the process and enjoy the small things, how you made a great loop , how you were able to return more consistently and with quality, how you were adapting and understanding your opponent's strategies ... it will go a long way into enjoying the process .. the challenge in table tennis is that far too often we judge our progress by win/loss percentage, but the reality is that its not even whether you are able to get more and more points in individual games, its actually about how many more balls you were able to put on the table. As one great sage once told me, and I consider him a sage because well he won and medal-led in quite a few world championships , whoever puts one more ball on the table wins .... we lose sight of this simple fact far too often and try to play something that "Der_echte" calls "Macho Man Table tennis " which is an unfortunate side effect of watching too many pro games in youtube
... so always remember to tell yourself to play with heavy spin irrespective of how much speed you are getting on the ball ... unless you use it as a variation, power / speed without spin is always the easiest thing to adapt to .. holding it loose to return a speedy shot is much easier than trying to find the right timing and impact to block a spinny loop. Even comparatively newbies with sub-optimal technique can return ball hit with more power than block back a heavy spin loop ... remember that a block off a heavy spin loop always sets you up for the next ball, but a block from less spinny but more speedy loop frequently finds you out of position ...
Anyways, here are some of the tips I have received over the years to manage the mental aspect of the game, I bet some of them have already been mentioned :
1. Take one point at a time and if you can convince yourself, treat every point as 0-0 .
2. Have mental routines on the table . For example, when you are going to serve take a few seconds to remember what kind of point you want to construct, there is always some predictability if you are serving short you expect a drop shot or a long push , play it out in your head quickly . But make sure you focus on the blade of the player who is returning so there are no surprises.
3. When you are returning the serve remember that its the opponents initiative so remember to hold the paddle loose and if you need to shake your hand loose do so before every point. Remember the first thing that you need to do is to put the ball back in play. Its totally fine if the server can attack your return but make sure you make him play at first. You can slowly figure out the placement and the spin and stop him from doing a quality attack.
4. Recognize your strengths during match play . We are not pros and we are not playing 9 hours a day everyday. So when we turn up for a match , certain things work on certain days and certain things don't even though you have been working on it in practice. Recognizing and accepting whats working and how to manage and get your strengths into play in the match helps a lot.
5. Remember to breathe , it helps you relax ..take your 6 point breaks ... to slow down the play to your speed .
6. Focus on one thing at a time and if you are able to get that one thing done call it a win in your head, don't worry about the score.
7. Play the game because you love the game and not because you love to win ... tell yourself that as long as you are making progress in practice , it will ultimately start showing in match... thats how it works .. where else will all the practice go ... but you have to let it come into your match play and and not cause a mental barrier by focusing on the win but not on the entire process ...
and lastly , be thankful that you are able to make so many friends because of table tennis ..
That has been my mantra lately, i even wrote it on my wrist to remind me between games: "Have Fun". That is why i play, nobody is pressuring me to play, i do it because i love the game. So why can't i just have fun and play? Sometimes is easier said than done, and i struggle to find that mindset.