Hey, Anders, I respect your opinion and I know that there are so many people on this forum who agree with you that a handshake after a match is important. I just don't see that it is. I think it is a formality that is too rigid. I personally feel that the person who won the match probably does not care either way because he won. I have never felt like I did not want to shake the hand of someone who I just won a match from. And, in my opinion, if you have to shake hands after a match no matter what, it does not mean anything; it is just a formality. So, I feel, rather than having it be some compulsory act that then loses its meaning, the person who lost should actually be the one who decides whether to do it, and then, you would see some handshakes that really meant something.
There are times when I have lost a match where I didn't feel like there is a need or a point in giving the other person a handshake. And it might not have anything to do with the opponent. There are times when I don't want to shake the other person's hand and it definitely has to do with the opponent or something he did in the match. And there are times where I want to shake the other person's hand because they played great and I want to let them know I feel that way. In only one of those circumstances, the last one, would the handshake actually have real meaning.
So why should it be compulsory.
But every so often you see someone who is so upset that they lose touch with where they are and what they are doing. Not to be sexist or anything but I see this happen with women more often than with men. I think this is may be because for women it is more socially acceptable for them to be in touch with their feelings and express those kinds of emotions. I think, for men, often crying or being upset is really looked down upon and as a result most men, when they are feeling any other negative emotion, it ends up expressing itself as anger instead of the actual underlying emotion. That is often what happens when you try to suppress a heavy, negative emotion: it comes out as anger. But every so often you see someone, or have to deal with someone, who is so upset that they are not grounded and not in touch with where they are.
If that is what is going on inside someone, I don't think they need to shake my hand after a match. I am sorry but I think the hand shake thing is way out of proportion to so many TT fans. After a basketball game, some of the guys from one team and the other shake each other's hands. Not always. Sometimes they just head to the locker rooms. After a baseball game it is rare that the two teams greet each other at all. After an American football game, sometimes the head coaches shake each other's hands, not always; sometimes some of the players greet some of the guys on the other team who they know and like, not always.
Why should it be mandatory in Table Tennis. I really don't get the idea of repeating what sometimes comes out as a hollow gesture. I think a handshake should happen when it is felt by both players, and therefore conveys actual affection and acknowledgement of an achievement from the defeated player to the victor. I actually, personally think that it shows less respect to shake someone's hand when you don't mean it, than to choose not to shake the other person's hand.