A pathetic situation?

[FrenchFrog33]

The main reason I enjoy this forum is because of my extreme introvertism and shyness. It so bad that the last 2 times I went to the club, I just sat there and didn't play at all. I don't know if it's because of my low level of play or not being able to approach people? The only time I play is when pay coaches for an hour.
Okay, this is the time when you all call me names or throw insults at me.

 

[TensorBackhand]

The main reason I enjoy this forum is because of my extreme introvertism and shyness. It so bad that the last 2 times I went to the club, I just sat there and didn't play at all. I don't know if it's because of my low level of play or not being able to approach people? The only time I play is when pay coaches for an hour.
Okay, this is the time when you all call me names or throw insults at me.

Yeah I know how you feel. I see a lot of people like that in our club as well, just sitting there and waiting and kinda looking.

Usually I kinda look at them, and they look at me, but we never approach each other to play.

But what works for me is I just stand waiting at a table, and then eventually somebody will come up to the table and ask to play.

 

[hclnnkhg]

If you sit there the whole time and no one sort you out, your club is poorly managed...
Potential solution may be to go very early for a session such that there are only a few players so they either sit around or have to play with you.

 

[blahness]

The main reason I enjoy this forum is because of my extreme introvertism and shyness. It so bad that the last 2 times I went to the club, I just sat there and didn't play at all. I don't know if it's because of my low level of play or not being able to approach people? The only time I play is when pay coaches for an hour.
Okay, this is the time when you all call me names or throw insults at me.

I always have hits with newbies no matter their level. There's a lot of snobs and unpleasant ppl in TT in general and you have to kinda block some of these voices out for your own mental health. Tbh I love to trigger the assholes for fun but it's a dangerous idea xD

If it's possible maybe make some friends at the club? Just say hi and make some conversation to someone who is similarly alone.

 

[Gozo Aruna]

true story:

I had a dude, he bought a carton of soda and then he challenge the club; beat me and one can of soda is yours. He get some hits. End of true story.

 

[lodro]

Both the clubs i play now have a 1/2 hour "arrive and play who you want" session, followed by
often some doubles that are organized by the club captain and helpers and after that
everybody organizes themselves either into single or doubles .
Some players miss out the first part and arrive for the set up games.

There is no shame or blame involved in being shy and /or introverted, we are what we are.
I have my only little corner and sit on my own, I don't like to gossip unless it is TT stuff and of
course i get plenty here. 😁

 

[JJ Ng]

The main reason I enjoy this forum is because of my extreme introvertism and shyness. It so bad that the last 2 times I went to the club, I just sat there and didn't play at all. I don't know if it's because of my low level of play or not being able to approach people? The only time I play is when pay coaches for an hour.
Okay, this is the time when you all call me names or throw insults at me.

Who is the club owner? You may want to talk to him/her.

I think everyone should play with each other. One club I go to is way bigger, and the club coach/owner will tell people to play with each other and will keep track of time and kick people off to let other people play.

The other club I play at is smaller. And yes, you rely on players to bring newbies to the table.

Honestly your level is pretty good at any US club. You deserve to play!!!!

 

[Tony's Table Tennis]

Each club is run/managed differently.
So to speak so vague, there is only a dozen questions in my mind.

How many tables are there? how are the tables separated?
Some maybe are training tables?
Some maybe are match tables?
How many people is in the club at any given time?

Where did you sit? by the training/match tables? or seating area far from the tables?

Do you know any other members there?
are there any other members of your level?

 

[burakins]

I understand what you feel.

1-Don't be shy, and just stand there
2-Talk with the owner of the club. He/she knows who is at your level and can match 2 players like that to play.
3-You can ask to the guys: " Can we train together ?" instead of " Can you play with me ? "

Your level can be low to play with high level players but at you can approach them by asking f.e: " Can you help me to improve my ....... f.e (fh topspin)" in that way then may practice with you.

 

[FrenchFrog33]

Each club is run/managed differently.
So to speak so vague, there is only a dozen questions in my mind.

How many tables are there? how are the tables separated?
Some maybe are training tables?
Some maybe are match tables?
How many people is in the club at any given time?

Where did you sit? by the training/match tables? or seating area far from the tables?

Do you know any other members there?
are there any other members of your level?

6 tables (including 1 in the back for training)
6-20 people at any given time.
1 area for sitting, right behind the barriers.
I know some of the members somewhat.
There are about 5 members at my level.

 

[jammmail]

The main reason I enjoy this forum is because of my extreme introvertism and shyness. It so bad that the last 2 times I went to the club, I just sat there and didn't play at all. I don't know if it's because of my low level of play or not being able to approach people? The only time I play is when pay coaches for an hour.
Okay, this is the time when you all call me names or throw insults at me.

First up its not a pathetic situation - don't beat yourself up like that.

TT in general can be clique - its an aspect I really don't like about it.

I agree with a lot of what people have said in trying to speak with the people that run the sessions as a first idea.
It may seem different in your head, but I imagine that people aren't playing with you in spite - its just because they don't know you.

Its a difficult step, I myself would not be classed as a confident person, but you really need to be bold and ask people to play.

 

[Tony's Table Tennis]

6 tables (including 1 in the back for training)
6-20 people at any given time.
1 area for sitting, right behind the barriers.
I know some of the members somewhat.
There are about 5 members at my level.

okay,
Some times, places are so full, it is impossible to even squeeze in. So it sounds like space/spot isn't a problem for you.
It doesn't feel like more than 4 per table. 3 is actually a good number if it was to play matches.

Maybe speak to the members you know, or comfortable to speak to and ask if you can play for them.
If the level difference is quite large, then maybe speak to the 5 at your level to see if you can have a knock with them.
So I'm assuming, there is at least 2 tables you can hang around with.
What I suggest you to do is to try and play with all 5 players your level, and from there, hopefully you can have a chance to play between 2 to 4 tables

Some times, some people just want to play matches, some wants to play doubles, some wants to train.
So you just need to find TT pals that fits your preference.

Owner can help, but if you not uncomfortable to speak out, you could start speaking to the ones you comfortable to play with first.
Other than speaking to the owner, if coaches are at the same club, maybe their could advise who you can knock with and help start that conversation with those players.
You just need that "intro" to get going, and next time, you just walk in there and find your TT pals and you kindof slot in automatically

 

[omgtodamax]

Try to make the most out of every situation. This reminds me of when I first started playing, I would go to the local rec center and just sit there. Occasionally, some old guys would approach me and ask if I want to hit. But I really benefitted from just watching and listening to the old guys talk about table tennis.

 

[BaRanchik]

If you are not the only one sitting, then take another player, and ask to cross-train with a pair who is already at a table. I found this to be the only way to get table time for warmup in competitions here, and being somewhat of an introvert myself I can tell you that it gets easier after every time you do that.

"Hey, want to ask X and Y if we can join them?"
Then you ask X and Y, and they hate you for it for a few minutes, but most likely they will agree if there are no spare tables, and they aren't doing a specific exercise.
Next time, X and Y will be shaking when you enter the club.

 

[lightspin]

There are actually a lot of players in your situation. Once people are done playing, you could just ask one if you could hit for 5-10 minutes. Usually the player will say yes. Another thing to do is to get someone's phone number and then arrange to play with them the next session at a fixed time. Personally, I only go to the club when I have arranged practice. If I just show up and hope someone will be there, I will be very disappointed.

No matter how bad you think you are, if you ask any player who isn't busy if you can do drills with them for a few minutes, they will say yes. If you see two serious players drilling like they are preparing for the world championships and call next, expect them to not be happy. If you wait until they are done and ask "hey do you have 5 minutes to hit forehands and maybe give me some tips?" they will most likely say yes. If you approach people the right way you will have a ton of willing practice partners who will help you out. Do it the wrong way and things at the club won't go as smoothly.

Also don't be shy. If Ma Long played you and then played the best player in your club, the score would still be 11-3 or worse, so feel free to ask anyone to play. Just don't interrupt practice and be polite about it.

 

[Der_Echte]

A lot of this is suitability to other players... not a lot of players are gunna go out of their way to play vs players that where they are getting nothing out of the transaction.

Sometimes, you run into someone who just wants to help, in this case you are giving something to them, a chance to help.

Sometimes it is better to approach these in the manner lightspin suggested - ask for a very defined 5 minute hit, even snobs can afford 5 minutes - they know it will be over soon and you may do something to change their attitude.

With time, just getting better and being more of a challenge is it... but until then, finding a way to be useful to these players is it... and blocking close to the table is one good way to be useful. many good players simply want to FH topspin to a fixed spot over and over... and if you can keep that gravy train going by being consistent, you have a foot in the door.

 

[Der_Echte]

In either event, make your way to Sacramento, Every Mon and Fri night from 5 pm to at least 10 pm, there are 12-24 players and 4 tables at the 1st Slavic Evang Church... and the guy in charge ENSURES that no person is sitting alone not playing unless they demand it that way.

You could also meet the world-famous Sergey - don't call me - Scoobie-Doo.

 

[Der_Echte]

Think, for the price of airfare and some pocket change, you could have a one on one session with USA's No 1 expert on the treatment and usage of H3. After you leave, you with hate MX-P after 2 weeks of use and especially k1 hybrid which is practically anti rubber.

 

[blahness]

A lot of this is suitability to other players... not a lot of players are gunna go out of their way to play vs players that where they are getting nothing out of the transaction.

Sometimes, you run into someone who just wants to help, in this case you are giving something to them, a chance to help.

Sometimes it is better to approach these in the manner lightspin suggested - ask for a very defined 5 minute hit, even snobs can afford 5 minutes - they know it will be over soon and you may do something to change their attitude.

With time, just getting better and being more of a challenge is it... but until then, finding a way to be useful to these players is it... and blocking close to the table is one good way to be useful. many good players simply want to FH topspin to a fixed spot over and over... and if you can keep that gravy train going by being consistent, you have a foot in the door.

+1 on blocking skills to make yourself incredibly popular. I got a lot of free coaching from very good players because I could block consistently.

 

[JeffM]

Lots of excellent replies in this thread already. I'll share my experience.

It is a common situation, usually for newcomers to a club.
I am also not an extrovert but I find that when I go to a TT club, everyone has something in common: they want to play TT. This makes it much easier to start a conversation and have a hit.

When I went back to Hong Kong for holiday and then randomly went to a tt club where I knew no one, everyone there sort of know how the system works except me. But I would just sort of stand outside the barrier with my bat and they would get the hint that I am interested to have a hit. The rules there were that ppl have to play matches, so it makes it easier as people would have to finish a match and then walk off, and then other people see me waiting there would then ask to play me just to get a game going. If no one asks you for a hit, you could take the initiative and ask them for a hit, and you may find it more comfortable asking those that you think are of similar level to you, but it doesn't really matter if you don't or they aren't free.

If the situation is that they are all snobs and they don't want to play with you for whatever reason, then maybe you can find a new club.